speechless cry

While talking about universal peace, it seems everything is so clear. We need just to recognize ourselves in others and to act accordingly. While looking at a flower (or the pavement brick- at anything at hand) it is just hard not to see the widely opened eyes of oneself. These discoveries comforts and supports, the peace guides me by replacing all the questions into the firm trust in God's care for us and His incredible love. That's fine in spite of the fact that my eyes rarely shine. While feeling myself as the grateful giant, I am to rest in sick body of the disabled... though it is easy to explain the cause of my jobless-ness and the consequent financial impotence, yet it is so hard to admit that I need to beg for the things (for example, the computer and its maintenance) that are just obligatory for the sharing of my pictures ... for a free.
Though I have arranged lots of exhibitions already and received lots of wonderful feedbacks, my artworks didn't earn a penny to me - I collected just the huge dept, thus I question myself, what's the cost of beauty? Have I the right to talk about the benefits of the positive thinking and the alike matters?
I know just one - I have no right to live silently. My head bones were broken in 1974 and I walked on the edge of the death, but the miracle happened - I was returned to life. Though I am very sick, yet I have no outward signs of any disability. In other words I just must to share my gratitude with all on my road.
Thank you for your help to do that, to fulfill my mission. Your hearty feedbacks help me to forget my limitations and to participate in life fiesta - to glorify God for His help to stay alive till now.